Why She Won't Call - Lessons Every Pick-Up Artist Must Learn

Why She Won't Call - Lessons Every Pick-Up Artist Must Learn by Stephen Nash

Why SHE Won't Call... Let's call this my "She's Just Not That Into You" series, to borrow the phrase from Behrendt and Tucillo. She's just not that into you...if she doesn't return your calls.

How many times have you found yourself wondering, "does she like me, or not?" Maybe you have just met her, and simply cannot tell. Or, maybe it's the third date, and you still feel uncertain.

Listen, women are subtle. They will usually indicate their interest to you, or not, indirectly. They are not going to run up to you and shout into your ear, "I AM INTERESTED, KISS ME NOW PLEASE!" OK?

Likewise, they are not typically known for being blunt either. So, expecting her to simply tell you that she has lost interest is unreasonable. In this series, I uncover the common signals that women send to men indicating their lack of interest. Also, with each "symptom", I will offer a "cure" for fixing this issue the next time.

She's Just Not That Into You...symptom #1:

You give her a call, but she doesn't call you back...what to do?

This happens to each and every one of us. It has certainly happened to me more than once. What this typically indicates is a lack of connection. If you call her once, and you receive no reply, definitely try her again. But, if she doesn't pick up on the second call, leave this message:

"Hey, it's Stephen. I thought I would give in one last shot at meeting up with you. I enjoyed our conversation, and hoped to continue it sometime. Anyway, here's my number, and I wish you the best."

This is so solid because it tells her that you will not chase her, and that you are willing to walk away. You are not desperate. If you have seen "Swingers", recall the excruciating scene when John Favreau calls the girl he just met at the club. If you haven't seen this classic, rent it tonight.

This message often gets a call back, as she realizes you are serious about meeting up with her. If she doesn't call you back, then you know one of the following has happened:

1) She is not open to meeting anyone new right now;

2) She does not trust you.

We have no control over situations where the woman is simply not interested in meeting someone new. She may already be in a relationship or just be in town for the weekend; we'll never know, so don't dwell on it.

However, we can influence the initial interaction so that she feels greater attraction and trust for us. If you consistently do not get return calls from women, you are not handling this first exchange with enough care and intelligence for her to ever want to see you again.

Being an attractive man is both an internal belief, and an external skill set. Do you know how to flirt? Do you know how to tell a story (and not put someone to sleep)? Do you know how to tease? Do you know how to do all of this without coming across as weird and creepy? Do you have a plan of action when meeting women? Do you know how to structure an interaction to insure a date?

In my book, "How to Get a Girlfriend", I cover these topics in massive detail. For now, just realize that a woman must feel attracted to you before she will be willing to give you her number.

So, since we are trouble-shooting phone calls, let's assume she felt that spark of attraction, and in the flush of the moment, handed you her card. Now, you have phoned her a couple of times, but she won't call you back...why is this?

She doesn't trust you.

Trust is a complex issue, my friend. In order to understand it, put yourself in her shoes for a moment.

First, you are approached by this cool guy, and you are engaged in a conversation. It flows nicely from the beginning, and you find him attractive. You then talk about this great film you both saw last week (coincidentally) for about ten minutes. He seemed charming, so you gave him your phone number. After you left, you started asking yourself some questions. What do we really have in common? What will we talk about if we went out? Would it be comfortable? Why does he like me, when he knows nothing about me? Is it only for my appearance? Who was that guy?

You see where this leads, don't you? She doesn't really know you, so she cannot trust you or your intentions. You may be sincerely interested in her - perhaps her vibe was irresistible, or her appearance was too beautiful to pass up - but unless she feels a solid connection, you won't see her again.

You have been thrown in the pile with all the other guys who, "only want me for my body".

So, how do we create this solid connection?

In brief, you talk about many different things. We call this wide rapport. In the example above, I describe deep rapport. When you first meet a woman, and you know you want to see her again, you need to create wide rapport.

Talk about a lot of topics by using your conversation skills. Be sure you reveal aspects of your personality and your background. Don't go into a full life story, but be sure to let her know SOMETHING about you. She has to leave knowing enough about you in order to feel comfortable seeing you again.

When she feels you have more than just one thing in common, her thought process changes: Wow, I hope he calls, we have so much to talk about. I felt comfortable around him, because he knew how to hold a conversation. I enjoyed talking with him, he was interesting, and he really listened to me.

See where this goes?

In my ebook, "How To Get A Girlfriend", I go over this A LOT. Creating Attraction and Trust are critical to having an active dating life, leading to meaningful relationships. I also go into the real world skills necessary for revealing your personality, without it seeming too obvious or needy.

If you haven't bought your copy yet...what are you waiting for? Go for it. It is designed for guys who want the maximum edge with dating and relationships.

Wishing you the best,

Stephen Nash

About the Author
Stephen Nash of Cutting Edge Image Consulting (CEIC) is author of the book How to Get A Girlfriend: The Seven Essential Skills for Attracting the Woman of Your Dreams and Natural Attraction, 7 CD Audio course on image enhancement and dating for men.

This Amazing Step-by-Step Guide Exposes the Secrets to Attract and Seduce Any Woman. Becoming a Pick-Up Artist Is Easy When You Know How!